How To Stop Judging Yourself and Start Making Quantum Leaps in Your Business
I used to be the queen of self-judgment. As soon as a launch didn’t work or a program didn’t fill – I was the first to make it mean that I wasn’t good enough or that I wouldn’t ever be successful.
And here’s what I didn’t realize. All that energy that I spent doubting myself was wasted. If I had just picked myself up, created a new strategy and moved forward – I might be a millionaire by now.
Do you find yourself doing the same thing? You get home from a speaking event and you replay how it could have been better over and over again.
You don’t meet your monthly client or income goal and you begin to wonder if you just aren’t meant to be in business anymore.
Your ideal prospect says “No” and you wonder if you’ll ever get a new client.
Then you spend the rest of the day or week half-heartedly doing the things on your list and being disappointed.
Here’s by far the biggest lesson that I’ve learned this year – and the reason that I’ve been able to triple my income, launching myself well into the multiple six-figures – a result is neither positive nor negative. It is just that – a result. It gives you information about the next step.
You see, many of you are afraid to take the bold actions that you need to take to grow your business because you are scared of the potential results. You are worried that no one will show up to your event, that someone will say no, or even that someone will say yes.
But the truth is that sometimes you need to “fail” in order to succeed. You need to take that bold action and have it not work out in order to learn the lesson you need to succeed.
Years ago, I launched a product that I spent over 4 months working on. I spent at least $30,000 prepping the product and the launch, not to mention countless hours working. I was sure it was going to work. And when I launched it, I sold no more than 5 products. I made a measly $800.
I was crushed. Absolutely devastated. Then I tried it again with a different product. This time I didn’t spend so much time and money. But it still required work. I did slightly better and came in around $4,000.
Neither one of them made the money I wanted them to make. And I continued to beat myself up about it for months. It wasn’t until my 3rd product launch that I finally made my goal of exceeding $20,000 (and this was years later).
What I failed to realize is that you can’t get to C until you go through A and B. I couldn’t have done that 3rd launch without going through the first and second one.
Results are a gift – no matter what kind of result it is. A result will give you the gift of knowing what to tweak and what to differently. Most importantly, it is the guidepost that shows you where to go next.
The most successful people aren’t stopped by their results – they simply treat every result as a test and they keep moving forward. Every step forward is a wiser step because it is done with the learning of the step before it.
I know that this concept is so hard to take in during those moments when you want to scream in frustration.
As a member of the perfectionist club myself, there are many times when I have to repeat the mantra “There is no positive or negative results. Everything is a test” in my mind over and over again. And usually by the 10th time, I stop beating myself up and I begin to look at what I could do differently next time.
The next time you find that your favorite client just dropped out. Or that person who you know is perfect for your program just said no, remember to stop the judgment and frustration. Pause. Look at the situation and ask yourself, “What is the gift? What is this situation trying to teach me?”
The better you get at pausing and asking, the faster you’ll move on to your next bold action. The more bold actions you take – and the more clarity you have around how to grow your income and make more money – the faster your business will grow.
