The Fabulous Five

Build More Confidence, Business Mindset

“Rich people are mean.”

“Successful people take advantage of others.”

“I wonder what she had to do to get there.”

Every day we are surrounded by people who are threatened by those who are successful.

Just underneath the surface our loved ones and friends can harbor jealousy and deep misunderstanding of who we are as entrepreneurs and what we do.

I remember sitting in a restaurant during the first year of my business with a group of my friends who worked at corporate jobs. They were talking about the woes of work and the lack of vacation time. It was my first year of business, and I was studying the menu to try to find the cheapest appetizer that looked like it had enough food to keep me full for a couple of hours. I was also trying to spot the waitress so I could ask for a separate check without being noticed. My friend looked at me and said, “Monica, you are so lucky. You don’t have to worry about anything. You can take a vacation anytime. And you get to play all day long.”

I did the best I could to swallow my anger. She had no idea what was going on in my life. That the last 3 months I had been living off the checking overdraft. That any “free” time I did have was consumed by worry, doubt and fear. That I was living the crazy, scary life of a first-year entrepreneur.

And yet, I had the desire to fit in. To somehow salvage my last vestige of normal life.

So I just looked at her and faked a smile.

From that day on I started looking for other entrepreneurs who I could hang out with. Those that understood me. I especially looked for those that were patient enough to hear me rant and rave, but not patient enough to let me stay in my negative space.

Today, I teach my clients to create a list I call The Fabulous Five. There is something amazing about cultivating five people with whom you don’t sit in comparison or shame — where you are given the space to be vulnerable. Five names of entrepreneurs, kindred spirits, who you could call or text day or night, and they would answer and talk to you about any struggle. Do you have your Fabulous Five?

If not — let’s get started!

First, write down the names of Five Entrepreneurs who you could call at any time, day or night.

Then, for extra credit – write down what each person’s strengths are.

For example:

Claire M: She will always allow me to complain for 2 minutes, then sternly remind me of all the great things in my life.

Sarah H: She always makes me laugh — no matter what. She reminds me that nothing is all that serious.

If you are having trouble finding your Fabulous Five, write down the names of a few places you could go to start meeting more entrepreneurs.

Photo: flickr, Alan Levine