Defining Fear
I find myself in conversations around fear a lot with my clients. Fear occurs so often as an entrepreneur; if you let it, fear will take you out of the game. Fear comes in many forms: procrastination, resistance, hiding, avoidance, blame, anger, sadness, discomfort, and laziness.
What I find amazing is that our society has trained us to run away from discomfort – to do anything to alleviate it. We view fear and discomfort as being “bad” or a sign that we are moving in the wrong direction.
But there is a difference between fear and intuition. Fear will keep you from doing what needs to get done even though you know you need to do it. Intuition is a voice that gives you information but doesn’t stand in your way.
Many people confuse the two. They walk away from a challenge because they don’t want to experience the fear, and they mistake it as their intuition telling them no.
If you are ever confused between the two, I encourage you to stop and ask yourself – is this fear or is this intuition saying no? If you just get quiet, close your eyes and look within – you’ll get the true answer.
Fear and I have become close friends this year as I did my tour around the country and Money 2.0, my 3-day event. And we learned a lot about one another.
I discovered that living with fear and acting anyways has led to a huge quantum leap in my business and in my life. I am literally a different person now than I was in January. I’m more patient, more resilient, wiser, more confident and more alive now than I’ve ever been in my life (oh and much wealthier too 😉 ). All of it happened because I saw my discomfort and walked straight towards it.
Here are three things that I learned about fear and discomfort:
1. Get comfortable being uncomfortable.
If your intention is to grow your business by leaps and bounds, you can’t do things tomorrow like you do today. You need to constantly be growing on an emotional, physical and spiritual level. And grow fast. That’s part of the fun of being an entrepreneur.
But that amount of growth isn’t always comfortable, and sometimes it’s just downright painful.
And in the end, you just get comfortable being uncomfortable. You grow your container to handle more emotion, more risk, and more fear. This happens over time if you just stop resisting it.
2. Change is good.
Most people are afraid to really give it their all in their business because they are afraid of what they will need to give up or sacrifice in their lives. They are afraid of the work that it involves and the time spent.
Here’s the thing – yes things might have to be “given up”. But the truth is that change is good. You can’t get to point B the same way you got to point A. So the “giving up” is just part of that change. And by willing to do what it takes, you are also letting the universe know that you are open to change and open to the path that will take you to point B and move you well past point A.
Keep in mind that if you are clear about how you want the path to look like, the universe will help you create it, without giving up that which is important to you in the long run.
3. If you’re playing big, you’re risking big.
Many people I know don’t like to gamble. Mainly because gambling is downright frightening – you can lose everything rather quickly. But the people who love to gamble are those that love taking risks. They know that the more money you put down, the more money you’ll win.
The same is true for business. If you want to make a quantum leap, you’ll need to risk quite a bit. You risk money for training and mentorship. You risk your confidence in doing things you don’t know how to do. You risk your intelligence in learning difficult things that you may not fully understand. You risk your relationships with family and friends by committing time and energy into your work. You risk the trust of your community by doing things that your partner and family may not approve of (like spending money).
I could go on and on. This is not a game for the faint of heart. But the rewards are amazing. I’ve watched my clients transform from doubtful and hiding to confident and shining. I’ve watched them earn the respect of their communities and families in a new way. And I’ve watched them purchase homes, cars, clothes and trips that were not in their reach before. Most importantly, they have become amazing, strong leaders – leaders that are changing the world.
Are you ready to face your fear, to step into your discomfort and act no matter what? Let’s do it together. I’m right here walking with you. And from this angle that ugly fear doesn’t look so bad anyways. If I can take him, so can you.
