What are you focusing on?
I was about six hours into one of my first events. I thought things were going OK, but could go a little better. My mentor leaned over to me and said, “Monica, walk more quickly when you go onto the stage. It will help with your confidence.” I was so overwhelmed with all of the direction and the newness of doing an event, so I just nodded and did exactly as she suggested.
Later that night as I fell asleep I pondered my walk onto stage. I asked myself, “why didn’t she tell me sooner that my walk was off. What else is she not saying?” And I let that thought percolate as I went off to sleep. For better or worse – that thought consumed way more time than it needed to.
Months later I still caught myself thinking it – and by then I had created an entire story around it – with much drama and fanfare. And of course I played the victim role in every scenario.
Finally, I decided to discuss it with my mentor. She kindly listened to me, and then responded. First, she wasn’t holding anything back. Second, she asked me a question that shifted everything: “Why were you focusing on what I said to you instead of what was most important at the event?”
That question literally rocked my world. I started to think about all the moments in my life that I had spend focusing on the “wrong” things. Making up stories about situations that didn’t really exist. Leaving money on the table. Focusing what people said or what they didn’t say instead of doing revenue generating activities.
And it has led me to become a “focus” fanatic. I realized that any given moment we have a choice of what we are going to spend our mental energy on. And this choice is incredibly important both to our own sanity and our bottom line. Our thoughts become what we put out into the world – thoughts become things.
I see entrepreneurs focusing on everything but revenue. Perhaps you can relate?
One woman told me she spent the whole week focusing on the fact that her husband was worried about money. Another entrepreneur told me she’s spent much of the last year feeling guilty about spending money on a coaching program that didn’t work. Yet another told me that she spent so much time thinking about what others would think of her, that it was hard to get her newsletter out.
Your Assignment:
I rarely give assignments in my blog posts – namely because I don’t like being told what to do and if you are on my list I suspect you might feel the same way.
But focus is so important that I literally could stand on a rooftop and shout about it for hours.
This week – take a mental inventory of everything that you spend your mental time on – that you think about. For the next seven days – keep a sheet of paper close to you and a couple times a day – write down your thoughts, especially times you worry.
Notice if these things come up during your workday:
• Do you spend time worrying about what could happen in the future?
• Do you spend time worrying about money, getting enough, asking if this business is ever going to work?
• Do you spend time analyzing what others have said to you in the past or might say in the future?
• Do you agonize over decisions and then “think” about them for days or weeks?
• Do you criticize, blame or put pressure on yourself for not being good enough or far enough?
• Do you hold onto conversations that you should have or would like to have?
At the end of the week, analyze. How many of your thoughts are moving you forward in your business?
Think of your mind like a golden bowl. When you carry an unfinished conversation, a decision you haven’t made, a worry that hasn’t happened, it takes up space in that bowl.
And the more space you take up with these thoughts – the less space you have for activities and opportunities that will help move you forward.
I’ve come to learn that FOCUS is a muscle – just like any other one. And that once I started to notice how much time and energy I was giving to things that didn’t matter – I could start to train myself to let one thought go and focus on another.
And once I let the thoughts go, then it was easier to create the time for doing activities that would directly generate revenue.
It actually gets easier over time – especially when you see the amount of positive results that come from it. Literally you’ll watch your entire life and business shift before your eyes.
Don’t get me wrong – I’m not perfect at this – and I still spend time ranting and raving. But you’ll find a little goes a long way when it comes to paying attention to what you are focusing on.
Leave me a comment and let me know how the experiment is working for you.
