Part 1: The Mess We’re In With Money: Why We Struggle To Keep The Money We Make
In honor of my upcoming Master Your Money Event (May 16-18th in Atlanta) — I thought I’d write a series on money. The need for money is unavoidable in business — to fund all of our dreams, hopes and ambitions. To help us live a beautiful life, while we hustle to grow our missions.
“Money isn’t everything — but it touches everything that matters.”
So why is it so messy?
Why are we always struggling with money?
Why does it feel so hard, especially for women entrepreneurs?
It starts with our beliefs. We are raised to not talk about money at all. It’s not polite to ask, “How much money does Daddy make?”
It’s not acceptable to talk about how much money is in your bank account or what you made this year. So we grow up avoiding the subject of money.
Compound that with the nauseous feeling that many of us get around numbers. We carry beliefs like, “I’m not good at math.” Or “I can’t do numbers.”
And before you know it — you’re doing your business without ever looking at the numbers. You tell yourself that money isn’t important, that you can live on less. You start cancelling gym memberships, extra travel, and eating out. The word “No” starts to come up more than ever before. And it’s all in the name of having a business. Doing something that you love. Stepping into your mission.
And for a while — this is all OK. But then it starts to get a little tiring. You wonder when the money piece will get easier — when you can stop worrying if you have enough. Secretly, you want to be able to take a real vacation. You wonder what will happen if you have expenses that are unplanned, like a car breaking down or a root canal.
Getting out of this money mess starts with examining your core beliefs and experiences.
At the Master Your Money Event, my signature 3-day event on money that happens in May, we spend an entire day diving deep here to answer the question as to why we struggle with money.
Over the next few weeks I’ll be going over sets of beliefs that seem to get in the way of generating and keeping more money.
This week — let’s talk about keeping money. Being able to actually save the money you earn. Being able to really enjoy your personal success. For many, it’s a much deeper concept than just being more disciplined or focusing on savings.
There are some deep beliefs that can keep savings at bay:
I remember speaking to one woman, let’s name her Jenn, whose family had grown up giving all the money away. They were a very religious family who believed that keeping extra money was wrong.
As Jenn started to think about her business — she noticed that she spent every dollar that came in. Sometimes even before it came in. She had a sense that it was wrong to have money in her bank account that was just sitting there. In fact, she even gave money that she didn’t have to charities, using her credit cards.
What happens as we grow up is that we see, feel and experience money in a very deep way based on our families and communities. And we unconsciously pick up our behaviors about money from them. If our family worried about money, we worry about money. If our parents worked too hard for too little — we do the same.
In this case — Jenn was caught in a cycle of giving money away or spending it.
Another client, let’s call her Naomi, noticed that in her family every dollar was spent immediately.
Naomi unconsciously mirrored the same behavior — every time she was disappointed, she would throw money at new programs, new marketing initiatives or anything that would make her feel better.
And once the money was spent, she did feel better. But she rarely did the follow through that would lead to success — actually doing the programs or working with the people she hired.
As a result — there was never enough money in her bank account, even though she knew she was making enough.
In so many ways — our actions around money were decided long before we started thinking about it. The good news is that now we have the ultimate superpowers: Awareness and Choice. The ability to become aware of why we are making a decision and choose a different direction. To understand why we struggle with money.
Take a moment and answer this question:
What was money like for you growing up?
Take a moment to talk to someone in your world about your answer at some point this week. Notice how it’s affecting your business decisions now.
And if you’re a woman entrepreneur ready to dive deep and clear this stuff for good — come join me at the Master Your Money Event in Atlanta in May. We’ll be working through this money piece from all different angles – and giving you a concrete plan to be able to make more money and enjoy more personal success — without having to give up your time or sanity in the process.
