The Visibility Struggle: Being Seen Means Seeing Yourself
Short-form videos, speaking gigs, workshops, live streams, etc. are great ways to gain visibility. But the problem with these is that you have to be willing to actually look at yourself – which can be so hard.
Just yesterday I was looking at photos of myself from The Big Comeback event. My hypercritical inner voices were having a huge party, saying the worst things. “Wow, your face looks puffy.” “That shirt isn’t the most attractive.” “You looked so much better at other events.”
Now, before you come at me with the “love-yourself” comments, I logically know that I look good in those photos (my makeup artist killed it).
I logically know that these voices aren’t helpful. But the truth is that they are there.
After 13 years of running Revenue Breakthrough and literally thousands of events, they are still there. The difference between today and 13 years ago is that now I know how to do my work in spite of those voices.
Last week, I ran a workshop for my RISE Business Academy. I had each of my clients shoot three videos and post one that same day. The biggest complaint I heard was “Wow, I just don’t like how I look.”
As women, we live in a very high-pressure world that demands makeup, thinness, perfect clothes, and high cheekbones. We spend hours comparing ourselves to each other, secretly wishing we had what someone else has.
And then, as entrepreneurs, our businesses have the audacity to ask us to show up? Show up on stages, show up in videos, show up in photos, and then, dare I say it, look at ourselves? See ourselves talking, posted, on video, in full light, over and over again?
What kind of evil is this? 😖
I wish I had an antidote for those critical voices in your head. I wish I could tell you how to make them stop, get softer, or just go away entirely. But the truth is that letting go of those voices requires us to work towards deep, lasting self-love.
So what do you do in the meantime?
My simple answer: show up for someone else. Get your own head out of the equation.
When I’m getting ready to shoot a video, I say to myself, “If this video helps one person feel better, then I’m doing my job.”
I tell myself I’m not doing this video to make myself feel good. I’m not doing it to look pretty. I’m not doing it to get tons of engagement or comments. I’m simply helping one person.
When I move from this place, none of those other negative voices matter. Yes, they will still be there. They will continue to shout their opinions.
But I know that I was given gifts in this lifetime and it is my responsibility to share them. That’s all that matters: me sharing what I have been given to help at least one person feel better.
Try out this perspective this week and see what it does to your critical voices.
May we all learn to serve fully from our highest self (even if her cheeks look puffy!).
And just in case you are working on getting more visible this year, check out my upcoming Bigger Visibility Event running virtually on May 8 – 10.
Reach out to us at support@revenuebreakthrough.com or join our Facebook group to get additional support.
